Two villagers all agog about the benefits which will accrue to them thanks to Modicare.
1st villager: Our PM has outdone that American president who made such a big deal about Obamacare. The Modicare health insurance plan which will cover 100 million families at Rs 5 lakh a family is much bigger and better than Obamacare.
2nd villager: You bet it is. Rs 5 lakh per family if you need medical care. Boy, I can hardly wait to become ill and have the sarkar spend five lakh on me. That’s more money than the combined annual income of the whole village.
1st villager: It sure is. And that includes the earnings of the village moneylender who charges us skyhigh rates of interest on the loans we have to take from him to pay the hakimji when we feel unwell. Our sarkar has not only outdone Obamaji, but also outdone all our previous sarkars who only promised us roti, kapda aur makan. Our sarkar is like that firang maharani who said roti ko goli maro, let them eat cake.
2nd villager: You’re right. Modicare is like eating a cake, and not just an ordinary cake but a special birthday cake, with extra cream on top. There’s just one thing. As 90% of all our diseases are waterborne wouldn’t it have been better and cheaper to provide us safe drinking water through tubewells rather than whack out five lakh per family on Modicare?
1st villager: Don’t be such a gaddha. Moditubewells sounds like something you buy in a hardware mandi. Modicare sounds much nicer, especially at election time.
2nd villager: But where can I go to spend my five lakh worth of Modicare? The primary health centre in our village is free.
1st villager: It’s free because there isn’t a primary health centre in our village. So we’ll all have to go to the big hospitals in the city, just like those rich folks do.
2nd villager: You mean those hospitals which overcharge by more than 1,000% for things like injections, and where a dengue patient was billed Rs 18 lakh and still died? I don’t think our five lakh of Modicare will go very far in such places.
1st villager: It’s the thought that counts. Think of Modicare not as a scheme for national health insurance but as a scheme for notional health insurance …
DISCLAIMER : This article is intended to bring a smile to your face. Any connection to events and characters in real life is coincidental.
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